Funny thing happened on the train home today.
Picture it – me, minding my own business, reading my Kindle seated in an aisle seat as follows:
There was a guy seated across from me diagonally in the window seat, concentrating on his smartphone. Then, a guy comes in and sits down in front of me. The smell of onions wafts over to me. Whatever – I just ignore and keep reading. The guy in front of is in light jeans and a black nylon jacket and sits with legs spread waaay wider than they need to be. (what’s up with that anyway…that’s a whole other blog post). He had put his gym bag on the floor beside him, in the aisle but still leaving enough room for people to pass by if they step carefully.
Next comes a woman who pauses next to our row and says softly “Excuse me” – I automatically swivel out to let her pass as soon as she paused knowing she wanted the empty seat next to me. Note that I was the one who moved to let her through. As she sits down, the guy in front of me says “Excuse me. Thank you.” implying that she didn’t and that she was rude. She simply said, very nicely, “I said excuse me” and sat down, then started reading her magazine. I just ignored everything and kept reading. I like my time on the train and like my bubble. Not much bothers me on the train.
As the train left Union station, the guy got fidgety, looking around, reaching into his bag for his phone, putting it back… Adjusting his legs from wide to wider… We passed one stop. Then someone walked down the aisle past our row and accidentally knocked the guy’s gym bag, said “Sorry!” and continued walking to the back of the train. The guy looked behind him to get a good look at the one who knocked his bag, then got fidgety again and finally picked up his bag to put it on his lap. I just kept reading.
Next stop comes, which is his stop, and as he gets up, he leans his bag on my knees for 2 seconds, then gets up and says with a bit of a slur/mumble: “Are you for real? You’re like a robot!” I just looked at him, took a couple of seconds to decode what he actually said then went back to my Kindle without giving him a second look. He then got off the train.
Wow – looks like this guy really wanted MY attention for some reason. Guess he’s not used to being ignored. *snicker*
What I should have said was: “Do you see this space?” and indicate the round circle round me. “This is my space. Unless I invite you in, you’re not welcome. Shoo.”
I’ve been called a robot before for other reasons. My husband calls me fembot because of my epic skills at Jeopardy, Wheels of Fortune and my excellent memory. But because I ignored someone desperately vying for my attention in an unattractive and unpleasant manner? That’s new.
I would have opted for “one with discerning taste” myself.
Seriously, the caveman antics got old about 20 years ago.